adults

Breaks that bring life with it.

I am in a very happy phase of my life right now. My life  presently is almost perfect though there are a few thorns on the way, they don’t seem like a huge mountain from my present view.

I am on my semester vacation for two weeks, which was a break that I was waiting for from a very long time. I wished to revive my summer vacation memories from my childhood by visiting our ancestral home where my grandparents had lived. I remember the days we went around and played hide and seek and the whole gang of cousins who rushed down there for vacations sat by the pond munching mangoes.Granddad used to tell us interesting stories and tales from the famous epics, from Mahabharata, Ramayana and stories of little Jesus and stories of Krishna’s. We would fight to get a spot next to Granpa just to hear his stories more clearly. Granpa and Granma would make us homemade chips and out of which Granpa was the head cook for all the delicacies that were cooked for us and were our favourites. The way he treated us, the way he treated my mom and the way he behaved at home would be the standard that every man entering our lives  and wishes to stay would have to match.

But this was the story from my childhood days but the situation now is very different. The house now lies uninhabited along with the neighbouring houses that were rustling with happy noises in the past are now replaced with a silence that echoes of memories from the past. Every door, every corner that I revisited talk about the people that once lived there, of the family that grew up there, of the children who were married off from the same house, of the little kids who were cheerfully welcomed by the grandparents, of stories how they grew older together and so did their grandparents. The households in its heart stories of a young man who was essentially  self-made, honest and loving. The man whom the entire village respected and came looking for advice.The house had seen a man who was an adored teacher and headmaster to every child who grew up in the locality, he was also a man who loved his land a farmer. The house was also home to a woman who was again above most common women of her times, a woman who was a teacher that too of a language that is not native to the land she stayed in, she was the one who supported the man of the house who looked after his mother who lost her memories like her own along with being a working woman, a mother and a farmer herself.

But comparing the present situation with past will mostly lead us to disappointments.My cousins and I have now grown up.Our timetables don’t match each other’s anymore. We no longer get  summer vacations. Everyone is getting a hang of responsibilities and each one of us trying our hardest to get used to being ‘an adult’. It is painful to see closed doors. But life has to go on and it is imperative that we change. It is important to grow up.

With time changing I have realized that I am no longer a child whose opinion is gullible. I have developed strong opinions on different subjects. Though I feel I should know my roots but I no longer am able to love people I once loved so dearly. I find them to be so disgusting at times that there is no point trying to convince them to open their closed brains to the bigger better world,  to get to know people from all walks of lives without prejudices and lame biases.

I used to see people previously either in white or black light, but I have over the years learnt no one is completely black or white, everyone is grey sometimes maybe with either of the two colours taking prominence over the other.  I now see People in different shades of grey.

There is also another thing I’ve come to realise some relationships in life are much more than blood relations. I have come to realise that after my family, it is not any relative that I would be willing to do anything for, it would be my neighbours and my friends.

I always wondered if it was possible to stop loving someone, I now know it is possible.  This break so far has taught me a lot of things that no textbook would ever. The life experiences I saw, people I met and the situations that changed the whole meaning of living for me was my biggest takeaway from my semester break.

Breaks and holidays help us grow into better human beings because it often takes us far from our mundane selves who are self-obsessed and selfish, Breaks help us reconnect with ourselves and others and makes us rethink our priorities.

Uncomplicate.

We care about wrong things, wrong people and wrong emotions that leave our life messed up and complicated. We do not express when we have to, we do not speak when our voices need to be heard, and we shy away from facing the light when that’s what we always yearned for.

We often find ourselves envying little kids. Mostly because they speak their mind when we cannot. They laugh at silly things and find happiness in smallest deeds that we chose to ignore. Ever wondered why we are often amazed at the innocence that they display?

The little children do not need big degrees or fancy houses to feel happy and content. They do not think of status before talking to a shabbily dressed kid across the street. They do not forge friendships because of greed. They do not make false promises nor do they shy away from being straightforward. They do not shy away from expressing love , dislike or desire. They often lose count of number of friends they have mainly because they are friends with everyone in their class. They are least tolerant to injustice, they cry and scream if they feel they are being wrongly treated. They talk about everything under the sun and even about the child next door whom they would marry when they grew up. They have no false pretenses.They share hugs and kisses without much thought.They dance and sing without requiring an occasion to do so. They do all this by being just themselves, children.

We on the other hand are not happy even with our fancy houses and degrees. We do not talk to a shabbily dressed person sitting next to us, well that is status. We often are blinded by greed when we forge friendships, and we get depressed when such friendships lose meaning after some time.  We do not realize that booze, money and party is not all that, what friends are for. We cannot afford to be straightforward and tell our friends when they go wrong, for the fear of losing them. We cannot even tell someone we like them again for the fear of losing them. We choose to love people with a set of conditions and changes applied to ourselves. We avoid confrontations, why? Because hey life will be much simpler with them and we are adults we cannot have simple lives. We do not laugh when we feel like, because we are well-mannered. We do not cry when we feel like, of-course we cannot show we’re fragile. We choose to be depressed but we would never share our feelings with others. We cannot see the beauty and the bliss that surrounds us, mainly because we are busy searching for things that are going wrong. We do not appreciate what we have until we lose it. We live under the umbrella of being responsible and forget we are not carrying the burden of the world on our shoulders. We cannot question without being judged. We do not ask for a hug when we need one. We do not stop even when we witness injustice, because we are trained to be scared. We choose to walk away.

Why are we doing this to ourselves? Why are we complicating our simple life? Why do we not have time for anybody anymore? Why are we cribbing and ranting all the time? Why do we chose money over happiness , Work over family,and stress over peace?  We need to stop this crazy maddening race, and look at the mess we have created for ourselves. We need to clean up the mess before it starts piling up.This mess can be cleared away by doing just one thing right looking at our life through the eyes of a child.

Let us un-complicate our lives and be little children again. Let us ask for a hug when we want one. Let us not lie when we need to speak the truth. Let us express not to impress, but because we need to express. Let us not hide behind our blankets when we witness injustice,let us scream let us shout. Let us let others know when we like them, more so when we love them. Let us really realize that we do not lose anyone by letting them know what they mean to us.Let us not be afraid to cry when we are hurt. Let us not bother ourselves with nasty comments passed by strangers. Let us say thank you when someone helps us, even if they are paid to do that. Let us accept our mistakes and say sorry without letting our egos get ahead of us. Let us treat everyone with the  respect that we expect from them.Let us start expressing that we care. Let us learn to be polite. Let us learn to understand and not judge. Let us learn to smile, for no reason at all. Let us learn to stop. Just stop whenever we feel like. Let us make time for more in life, not just for people in our phones but for real people in our lives. Let us experience happiness. Let us sing and dance whenever we feel like, without letting any tomorrow bother our today.

Let us un-complicate our lives. Let us live the rest of our lives like a child.