Author: Dhanya Purushothaman

Imagine. Look around. Cook stories. Pen down a few. That's me.

Musical Nights

Hi All,

It has been sometime, how have you been? A lot has changed since we last spoke. I changed jobs. Relationships changed with family and friends.  And then finally, I’ve found a job that I love (can you believe I’ve been on this one for over a year, despite a bad hike?).

Fast track to today, we’re all caged in our own houses for our own good (P.S – Do you also notice how free birds and animals are because we are caged in? Maybe we are the virus?). All this because one tiny micro-organism (and we thought we’re the best!) is on a homo-sapien killing spree.

But, in these testing and frustrating times, I’m here to talk of weirdly tiny romantic stuff that keeps us afloat everyday (Anyone could use a dose of positivity now right? 🙂 )A small story of an ounce of magic that adds beauty to my dull nights here. Here goes…

I’m 26 years old, and from a decade ago, while my sister and I were still in school, on a few blissful nights we would hear a soothing baritone singing old hindi songs of Kishore Kumar or Mohammed Rafi, from the building opposite to our typically middle-class home. We were always fascinated by the voice that was just as soothing and magical in boring nights.

I remember, even if one of us was asleep the other would nudge the other awake, if we heard the stranger’s voice crooning.  Followed by series of fascinated teenage giggles and desperate peeking out of the window to catch a glimpse of the face of the owner of the melodious voice. We always wanted to find out who the owner of this voice was, the singer who brought in hope and smile through our teenage years and as we progressed into becoming young women. Even if we wanted to find out, our strained relationship with the building owner (who brought only nuisance and dirty drains into our lives and lane) held us back from socialising with any of the 20 tenants in the horrendous opposite building.

But as we went through different phases in life, and while I moved cities and homes for education and job, his voice faded away from our memories.

Now, as all of us are confined to our houses; forced to be working from our homes, cooking, making tiktok videos, arguing with the house-mates (in my case parents), browsing through our old stuff, finding old diaries and burning pages that were full of pain we wish we’d never had, having extended photoshoots inside the house in different poses and angles, smiling at cute letters & greeting cards that our old friends and flames gave us and rekindling our old hobbies, some voices from the past also reach out to us.

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As I finish arguing with friends about about their lack of enthusiasm to dance on songs over video calls and cut the call, a familiar baritone from my window teases my ear, makes me smile. ‘Meri Sapno Ki Rani Kab…’ the carefree singer continues, unaware of a secret admirer nearby. I am further delighted when this jamming session is now accompanied by a guitar. Maybe, just maybe the familiar voice of an unknown stranger, on a silent night when PM announced the beginning of 21 day lockdown starting midnight to curtail the pandemic in the country of 1.3 billion dreams, that made

There is something extremely powerful about art & music that heals souls and gives new lives. For me though made me write after over a year.

Thank you wonderful stranger for the magic through your music. Thank you medical professionals & other professionals who work even now so that we can stay home & stay safe!

Stay Strong Everyone! Smile & Spread Some Cheer! Good Vibes Only ❤

Love,

A Grateful Stranger

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Before that time.

I am writing this because I know I might not be alone in this. I know there are fellow comrades who suffer and come out victorious every-time either braving it all alone or with the help of kinder ones near by.

There are these days, the days when I feel an irrational urge to destroy everything around, the days when even when everything is bright and sunny I can only see dark and gloomy, the days when I just cannot believe in people even when they have done nothing wrong, the days when I just want to shut the world down and just sit in a corner and cry. These are the days preceding the D-Day every single month.

All my questions are answered in 2 days following the day of drama, the day that proves I’m not actually that weak. Everything I felt two days prior is because of the stupid hormones doing rounds.

But I swear the days of the drama are the most mentally exhausting days, I question everything that exists. Every person around is annoying, all I want to do is scream and run away, but then the saner part of my brain makes me just smile and be nice as usual.

That cute pic on Facebook or that ‘video’ on a kind person who saved the day on Instagram makes me weep. Anything remotely ‘cute’ of people I do not meet regularly on social media has guaranteed ‘Awwww’ on these days.

The feeling of absolute annoyance with how hopeless my life is at the peak during these days. I would try and keep conversations and interaction with anything remotely human bare minimum for the fear of me going bazingaa on them and ending up ruining their day also.

Just, its just madness. I can feel the whole movie ‘inside out’ being played out inside of me, and trying really hard not to make a mess.

Well, these days are the hardest and I congratulate the fellow warriors who go through this every month and still smile to the world like there’s nothing wrong at all because that job pays your bills! 😛 Just hold on to that friend who’s hugs could help or even better get yourself that favourite tub of Ice-cream.

Yes, when the D- Day arrives every month the freaking physical pain is excruciating along with emo drama, and the pre-drama on the days before. But stay strong my dear sisters, because we’re made for more than just that.

gobbles that chocolate bar…Tadaa… Mmmm…

 

 

Just Another Day.

Have you had days when you wake up to the unwelcome realities of life? The instances that are usually hidden in the mundane routine of everyday life but occasionally when it surfaces it destroys you and leaves you broken. It may just last a day or a few hours but it feels horrible in general. All those sensitive nerves, fears and those issues you would never open up to anyone are suddenly injured and you don’t seem to be able to find your way out. That was just my day today, but again it was just one horrible day in a series of beautiful ones. So, I’m trying hard to let myself know that it is just another day.

It is during these days, you’re just thankful for that one person who would just listen and tell you to calm down. Thank you, bestie! ❤

Kuch Bheege Alfaaz!

I turned to Netflix to seek some escape from the thoughts running wild in my head and upsetting my otherwise happy life. I did not expect much, only thought this would be just another cheesy romantic watch which I would forget right after I finish watching it, but I was in for a surprise!

It has been a long time since a movie has touched me so much, Kuch Bheege Alfaaz is so beautifully made and the dialogues are just heart warming. This movie was a perfect blend of three things I absolutely enjoy, and had me hooked from the first scene.

Firstly, I have always been a sucker for Hindi poetry, sher and shayari in specific. I do not know any of them by heart but when someone recites these, I’ve already placed them on a pedestral.

Secondly, Radio shows have defined my college life and school life. I’ve always dreamt of becoming an RJ someday. When the RJs in the morning would crack a joke I’d laugh out loud to have fellow passengers look at me like I am some lunatic. The advices and fun in the morning Radio shows and the late night RJs with deep voices telling you soul stirring stories, would just be the only thing that the romantic in me would need to smile. I can tell you that Radio stations play the best songs on the weekends, and when that favourite song of yours is requested and played on the radio, you can just imagine yourself as the main characters in a movie and dance around.  I celebrated like it was my own radio show when one famous comic today, had excitedly spoken for the first time on his own show as a newcomer, and I felt his nervousness and thrill right through the radio like it were my own emotions on my very first radio show.

Thirdly, personal deep conversations. The ones that you have with an absolute stranger you just met, but about the deepest sometimes scary, sometimes the happiest memories of their life. The special feeling, when someone lets you know of their deepest fears, greatest desires and the dreams, in short baring all their emotions in front of you and leaving themselves so vulnerable. Some nights that I treasure in my life, are the conversations I have had with my friends, family and strangers looking right into the darkness over a cuppa tea or sometimes on a journey.  The stories are beautiful and sometimes so painful that you know this is probably the most intimate conversation you could have with that person ever. They are just so beautiful.

Kuch Bheege Alfaaz, had everything that was needed to stir my soul and make me fall in love with the creation. Poetry, Radio, Conversations, Stories, Vulnerability, Rawness and Imperfection. When Mr. Ittefaaq AKA RJ Alfaaz, just broke down while opening up I wanted to walk through my screen hold him tight and never let him go. Archie’s struggle and yet the charm is so beautifully captured. Another thing I loved about this movie is the setting, especially the huge spacious house of RJ Alfaaz with so much space and barely anything that would make it a home. His house was shouting of his emotional space and his story in general. Archie’s home in contrast was brighter but older, the switches spoke of the age of the house. It was delightful to watch how each relationship between the characters unfurl starting from the first scene, be it friendship, mother daughter bond, bonds at work, romantic bonds and just the bond between the chai wala and the customer.

If you are someone who enjoys similar things as I do, if you are also incapable of watching shows with bloodshed and violence and are in search of a story that would be a good watch, then go fall in love with Alfaaz and Archie.

I might have loved the movie because of my association with three major things, but kuch bheege Alfaaz, really did pierce right into my tiny little heart. Isi baath pe pharmaya hai,

Humne bhi kabhi gauwr farmaya tha,

Woh raat mei mauhaul hi aisa jamaaya tha,

Aap jaise kisi shaqs ne hi sunaya tha,

Aur aaj phir yaad aa gaye woh bheege se Alfaaz!

 

Thank you, Onir sahab! You left me sobbing and smiling.